


Doubts

by shoveoffmalfoy



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: A lot of it is just smut, Awkward First Times, Bisexual Harry Potter, Confused Draco Malfoy, Draco is v insecure, Gay Draco Malfoy, Hogwarts Eighth Year, Its just these idiots, Just being a little sad pining boy, M/M, Minor Luna Lovegood/Ginny Weasley, Pansexual Ginny Weasley, There isn't a plot, sorry but also not
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-14
Updated: 2021-03-14
Packaged: 2021-03-22 16:09:03
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,785
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30041289
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shoveoffmalfoy/pseuds/shoveoffmalfoy
Summary: Harry hears a rumour that Draco Malfoy is gay, and for some odd reason, this opens up a can of worms.
Relationships: Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter, Hermione Granger/Ron Weasley, Luna Lovegood/Ginny Weasley
Comments: 6
Kudos: 135





	Doubts

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! Thank you for being here and reading my work. This is my first fic, so there may be some mistakes. Please feel free to leave feedback, but this is all just for fun! :)

Harry was enjoying his treacle tart, not a care in the world when he heard, “Yeah, rumour has it Malfoy’s dating Nott now. One of the fifth years said they were all over each other in the common room last night...”

Harry dropped his fork. His head whipped around to the Slytherin table where Malfoy was currently laughing at whatever Parkinson was saying.

Without looking up from her book, Hermione said, “Close your mouth. It’s rude to stare, Harry.”

“Did you know Malfoy was gay? Is Malfoy gay or is that just a rumour? Why is he dating Nott?” Harry rambled to Ron, who rolled his eyes.

“You’re kidding right?” Ron mumbled through a mouth full of chocolate mousse.

“Why would I be kidding?” Harry’s brows furrowed as he looked between Ron and Hermione.

“Oh Merlin. You are blind sometimes Harry.”

“Yeah, seriously mate, I’m not exactly the most observant person and even I could tell Malfoy was gay.”

“How?! I thought he was dating Parkinson?” Harry ignored Hermione’s expression and focussed on Malfoy.

He knew Malfoy was attractive, but it was a fact he took for granted like the 'sky is blue'. Somehow finding out that Malfoy liked boys made Harry’s stomach roll. He didn’t know how to react. It felt as though this knowledge was waking up something in him that had laid dormant for a very long time.

“This might be a stupid question considering sixth year and all, but why are you so interested mate?” Ron turned to watch Harry watch Malfoy.

“ ‘m not. And sixth year was completely different and I’ll remind you I was right in the end so...” Harry drifted off and Malfoy ran his long, pale fingers through his hair. He’d let it go wavy this year but he kept it short. It curled around his ears and formed a small mop and the front of his head that covered his eyes when he leaned down to write in class. He’d shaved the back at one point then let it grow out, and around Christmas he’d dyed it pale pink. Harry had liked it pink. It made Malfoy look all soft and sweet like candy floss, he just wanted to sink his teeth into him...

What the fuck. Okay no. No no no no absolutely not. Harry’s legs had gone slightly numb and tingly and he was definitely nursing a semi. Just from looking at Malfoy. Oh Merlin he needed to speak to Ginny.

-

A few days later, after attempting to put Malfoy out of his mind, he went to Ginny to talk about his ‘gay crisis’ as Ron had dubbed it.

“Obviously you’re into boys!” Ginny threw her arms up and fell back onto her bed. Luna stroked her hair comfortingly.

“Wha-“

“Hun, I think we need to be more gentle with Harry,” Luna cooed down at Ginny like Harry wasn’t there, “he’s obviously going through a bit of a crisis here. And to discover his attraction to boys threw Draco must be a bit shocking, considering their past.”

“My what!”

“Your attraction to boys.”

“I think I need to lie down.” Harry took a deep breath and tried to think it threw rationally. It was perfectly possible that he was attracted to boys. He hadn’t really had time to figure any of this out while fighting a war. But Malfoy. No, that absolutely could not be possible. Even if he did want to feel the soft skin on the back of his neck, maybe Malfoy had soft skin everywhere...

No. Fuck this was getting out of hand.

“I think you should talk to Draco about this.” Ginny sat up on the bed and looked dead serious.

“You want me to discuss my gay epiphany with Malfoy, whom I might have a little gay crush on? Yeah great let’s discuss that for a second though.” Harry was pacing back and forth now.

“Okay, maybe not Malfoy straight away. Just try being nicer to him. Maybe he’ll initiate a conversation.”

“What would be the point anyway? He’s dating Nott! But it’s not like I want to date him.” Harry mumbled, still pacing.

Luna perked up, “Draco isn’t dating anyone.”

Harry stopped pacing. “What.”

Malfoy. Gay. Single.

The words flashed through his head with a lot of pale skin and wavy hair.

“I need to clear my head.”

Within about five minutes Harry had made his way from the common room to the broom shed. He tugged on some spare gear and grabbed a broom without looking. All he could focus on was the thrumming beat in his ears.

When he whipped around to face the pitch, someone was right in front of him trying to enter the broom shed. It was none other that Draco fucking Malfoy.

“Woah, easy there Potter.” Malfoy stepped back, “What’s got you so worked up?”

Draco was smiling softly and had his arms crossed over his chest. Harry’s mind stuttered to a halt.

“ ‘s nothing.” Harry looked down at his shoes rather than look at Malfoy.

“Mm. Feels like something. But I don’t care if you don’t want to talk. Fancy me wiping your arse instead?” Draco smirked.

Harry spluttered and choked.

“Seekers game, Potter. Want to play?”

Harry’s face burned red and , “Yeah, sure”, came out of his mouth before he realised that would mean seeing Malfoy sweaty in quidditch gear.

Fuck my life, he thought.

-

They finished around six, Malfoy having caught the snitch twice and Harry three times.

“You seem distracted Potter. Everything okay?” Malfoy said as they went to shower. Harry wasn’t yet used to Malfoy being kind and considerate. Nor was he used to seeing Malfoy all hot and dishevelled, beads of sweat rolled down his temple as he pushed his hair back from his face.

“Yeah. Fine.” Harry breathed out.

“Sure, well good game. Thanks and everything.” They entered the changing room and Harry quickly began to panic as Draco began efficiently stripping down.

Holy moly are we in a pickle now, thought Harry.

Harry directed his attention to a reddish brown spot on the wall and began to undress. Unfortunately, his eyes betrayed him and wondered to all that pale skin visible in his peripheral vision.

Well, now was as good a time as any to have this conversation. “Malfoy, are you gay?” Harry blurted out. The blond tripped over his trousers and burst out laughing.

“Slightly odd time to ask that question Potter, but yes.” The laughter drained out of Malfoy’s voice, “Wait, oh fuck. I- I can shower in the dorms if you don’t feel comfortable-”

“No, no it’s not that! You don’t make me feel uncomfortable.” Harry was lying but Malfoy made him uncomfortable in different ways. “I just. I heard something and it got me thinking.”

“Thinking about what?” Draco turned to face Harry who was just moving to turn on the furthest shower away from Malfoy.

“You, know. Stuff.” Harry soaped up his armpits and tried not to concentrate on Malfoy who was now moving closer.

“What kind of stuff?” When Harry stayed silent, Draco continued, “Is it possible you’re having a bit of a sexuality crisis? Because I had one of those.”

Harry’s head whipped to Draco who had selected a shower only one away from Harry. “You did?”

“Yeah, in sixth year. Purebloods don’t really do gay very well, so I suppressed it. Tried dating Pancy. Turns out we both hated that.” Malfoy smiled. Harry focussed on the way his hair darkened in the water and tried not to let his gaze drop.

“Huh. My problem is more with, um, someone.” Harry said vaguely.

“Ah, yes, I’ve been there too. Fallen for a straight boy?” Malfoy had flushed slightly, but that could have been due to the hot stream of the shower.

“No. I- I don’t know what to do.” Harry rested his head on the cold tiles, “He’s just. And I’ve never had these. These feelings before. Not for Ginny, not for anyone.” Harry was choking on his own words.

“Lucky guy.” Malfoy muttered so quietly Harry was almost certain he wasn’t meant to hear it. “Look, I think you just need to talk to him.” Malfoy looked like it physically pained him to say those words.

“Yeah that’s what Gin said. Thanks. And look, can this, you know, stay between us? Just until I figure things out?” Harry watched Draco give him a slightly sad smile.

“Of course. It’s no problem Potter.”

Harry had a plan.

-

All through the next month, Harry had talked to Malfoy. Just talked. And slowly throughout their conversations, Malfoy became Draco.

Draco, who curled up in the armchair closest to the fire in the Eighth Year’s common room with a book too big for his bony hands. Draco, who wore soft flannel pajamas, and had laughed when Harry told him he’d expected silk. Draco, who plays chess with Ron when Harry is tired of losing. Draco, who discusses S.P.E.W with Hermione and animatedly debates new Potions theories with her.

In short, Harry was beginning to realise that his little gay crush on Draco might be a bit more than that.

Harry was still working on his plan to ask Draco out. In the last month, he had read several books on sexuality and the LGBTQ+ community, suggested by Ginny, Luna and, to his surprise, Pansy Parkinson.

After the awkward shower conversation he’d had with Draco, Harry talked to his friends about his plan of action. However, while in the middle of explaining himself, Parkinson had burst into his room and insisted on knowing what he’d done to Draco.

She rushed the others out of his room, sat down on the bed and sighed. “Oh Potter. Potter, Potter, Potter. What have you done.” She shook her head.

She proceeded to lecture him about proper shower decorum, hinting that this was not the first time Harry had made Draco cry from an incident in the bathroom. That had wrecked Harry a little. He needed to apologize to Draco for that.

However, Harry was still grateful for their conversation because something Parkinson had said convinced Harry that he wasn’t crazy in his feelings for Draco. They might even be reciprocated. Maybe.

“Just be careful with him. We all thought you were straight, and he’s been quietly pining after you since sixth year. Tread lightly Potter.”

It brought Draco’s words back into his mind, “Fallen for a straight boy?”  
Harry’s heart leapt, but he tried to lower his expectations of Draco. Harry knew, even now that they were friends of sorts, they were both healing from the war. Draco might not want Harry yet, and Harry had spent the last month trying to convince himself that if Draco shot him down, it would be okay. He managed to convince himself very quickly, because some Draco was better than no Draco at all. Even if they were just friends.

That night, Harry knocked on Draco’s door just after dinner. “Who is it?”

“It’s Harry. Um, I just wanted to talk to you about something.” Hermione had insisted that Harry didn’t write a script. She said it would be better for both of them if it was genuine, in the moment.

“Come in then Potter.” Harry had stayed Potter to Draco, much to his disappointment.

Draco was huddled under several blankets and reading a huge volume. He was also wearing gold, wire rimmed glasses. This was Harry's favourite Draco revaluation. After years of being teased by Draco for needing glasses, Harry discovered Draco’s reading glasses. They made his eyes slightly bigger, giving him a cute, little owl effect rather than a Professor Trelawney effect. Harry loved them.

He sat on the edge of the bed, “You remember after that Seekers game, in the showers,” Harry took a deep breath, “you know I talked about- about someone I liked.”

Draco looked hesitant. “Yes? Any updates for me?”

Harry huffed a laugh, “Well I was thinking about telling them how I feel, and- and I was wondering if you had any advice.”

Draco paled and chewed on his lip, “Why are you asking me for advice? Go to Hermione.”

So Hermione gets to be called by her first name but I’m still Potter? Harry thought.

“You’re better with words than her. Don’t tell her I said that though.” Harry smiled at him and didn’t seem to notice that Draco looked sick.

“I don’t know Potter.” Draco’s voice was quiet and hoarse. “Just- just be yourself. If he likes you that will be enough.” Draco was looking down at his book. “Look I’m really tired Potter. Can you leave?”

Harry was shocked at such a change in Draco’s mood. He’d expected Draco to connect the dots and see that Harry had to be talking about him. Who else would it be?

“Okay, yeah I should probably go tell him. I’m heading to his room right now.”

“Great.” Draco choked out, not looking up from the pages. His hands were shaking. Harry wanted to reach out and grabbed them.

Instead he got up and left the room. He counted to five and opened the door again.

Draco was hugging his knees to his chest, blankets pushed to the end of the bed. Harry could now see Draco was wearing his old Weasley jumper with the big H on it. It was knitted in Gryffindor colors, and past Malfoy would have hated it. Harry’s heart pounded and he climbed onto Draco’s bed prying his bony hands away from his eyes.

He reached out and took Draco’s delicate frames off, he filed them and carefully rested them on the bedside table. Draco looked up at him through bloodshot eyes. Before he could say anything Harry pressed a gentle kiss to his cheek. And then the other one. Then slowly a quick peck on Draco’s pink, pouty lips. “Is this my jumper?” Harry asked, tugging gently at the fabric.

Draco’s mouth was slightly open as he gaped at Harry. He nodded silently.

“Mm. I like seeing you in my clothes.” Harry whispered against Draco’s ear, which he was pressing small kisses to.

“I- I don’t understand. What about-”

“It’s you, you tosser. Who else would it be?”

Draco’s shoulders unclenched and he sighed, “Oh thank Merlin,” before grabbing Harry’s shoulders and kissing him firmly on the lips.

Harry laughed against Draco’s lips and crawled on top of him. “How could you not see?” Harry directed his attention to Draco’s neck.

“Oh! Um, I couldn’t let myself hope. If it turned out to be someone else.” Draco was breathless and Harry licked and sucked over his pulse.

“Never anyone else, Draco. Want you.” Harry tugged on his jumper to have better access to Draco’s collarbones. Draco arched against him and moaned.

“Fuck Harry.” Draco’s grip on Harry’s shoulders tightened.

Harry smiled, “You’re so responsive.” As if to prove his point, he nipped at Draco’s collarbones and then ran his tongue over it to sooth the bite.

Draco bit his lip and trembled. “Potter I swear if you don’t start taking some clothes of right fucking now-”

“Hey, okay okay. How’s this?” Harry whipped his t-shirt off his head and threw it on the floor. He went to crawl over Draco again, but he had propped himself up on his elbows and was looking at Harry’s chest.

“I-“ he reached out hesitantly. Harry gently guided his wrist to touch his chest.

“It’s okay. You can touch.” Harry reassured him as he flushed brightly.

Draco slightly ran his fingers down the plane of Harry’s well defined stomach, up and round to his arms, also decently built and muscular.

Draco didn’t meet his eyes as he whispered, “I don’t look like this.”

Harry’s brow furrowed as he looked down at Draco, flushed and beautiful in his knitted jumper. “You have no idea how-“ Harry stopped himself. “Draco, look at me.”

Harry leant down and looked at Draco’s stormy eyes. “You are so beautiful, no let me finish,” Draco opened his mouth to protest, “I know you don’t see why I like you, but Jesus Draco, if you could see what I see,” Harry leant down and ran his hands under the jumper to feel more of the soft, flushed skin, “you would have no doubts.”

Draco cupped Harry’s cheek and swallowed. He lifted his arms above him in silent invitation and Harry slid the warm fabric from Draco’s body. As Harry had guessed, Draco’s chest is littered with thick pink scars, and mindlessly Harry begins to trace them. First with his finger, lightly running up the raised skin. Then with his tongue. Harry licked his way through the map of pink lines whispering, “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry my love.”

Draco pulled Harry’s face to his and whispered, “I forgave you a long time ago.” Harry’s lips locked on to Draco’s and soon he was writhing beneath him again.

Draco shuddered and gasped as he melted against Harry. “Harry, please.” Draco whined. He hooked a leg around Harry’s waist and began to grind against his hip searching for friction.

“Yeah, okay, hold on.” Harry held Draco’s hips down and slipped off his pajama bottoms. “This okay?”

Draco nodded and worked on Harry’s flies, “Need you. Please Harry.”

“Okay, shh, it’s fine. Let me take care of you.” He felt Draco shudder and Harry stripped off the last of their clothes.

Draco grubbed Harry’s shoulders hard enough to bruise as Harry’s hand slowly worked him open. When Draco was pliant enough for Harry to slip a finger in, Draco gasped and tighten around Harry.

“Shhh, it’s okay, I’ll go slow.” Harry pressed small kisses to Draco’s neck, cheeks, between his brow.

“No, no no no Harry, please.” Draco arched off the bed and pressed down on Harry’s finger before pulling back, and pushing back down with a moan. “More” Draco gasped.

“Fuck.” Harry watched Draco fuck himself on Harry’s finger and lost the ability to think.

He pressed Draco’s back firmly into the mattress and hooked both of his legs over his shoulders. “Ready?” Harry rested his forehead against Draco’s after Draco gave him a sharp nod.

Harry set a steady pace with two fingers now, steadily sinking them into Draco’s quivering hole, and withdrawing, only to pump them back in. “Aaaaah, Potter for fuck sake, I’m ready,” Draco was shaking with restrain, “Put it in now you prat.”

Harry huffed a laugh and carefully withdrew his fingers, ignoring Draco’s small sound of protest. He looked down at the sight below him. Draco flushed at the cheeks, cock dropping hard and red onto his stomach, pink hole clenching desperately.

“You’re so beautiful.” Harry licked the line of Draco’s throat and lined himself up.

Draco dragged his nails down Harry’s back and moaned when he began to push in. “Oh shit, Harry, oh Merlin this-“ he moaned again, “You’re fucking amazing.”

When Harry was buried deep into the warmth of Draco’s body, he gave him a second to adjust despite Draco insisting he move.

“I don’t want to hurt you. Just take it slow, love.” Harry watched Draco wiggle below him, trying to get Harry to move.

“I’m a virgin, not a champagne glass. You won’t break me Potter.” At Draco’s snarky tone (which was more of a turn on than Harry had anticipated), Harry pulled out and slammed back into Draco.

He set a brutal pace, and before long- “Draco, I’m-“

“Me too.”

Harry hurried his face into Draco’s neck and thrust one last time as he came. “Fuck.”

He reached down to Draco and gently stroked him before, “Harry!”

A sharp gasp and Harry felt Draco release and lie limp beneath him.

Harry just had sex. With Draco Malfoy. Holy shit. Harry laughed and began stroking his hands down Draco’s sides, leaving goosebumps all over his pale skin.

“This is lovely Potter but I should remind you, your cock is still in me.” Draco mumbled, relaxed.

“Oh yeah sorry.” Harry was still smiling as he rearranged Draco’s legs from around his waist. Draco moaned quietly when Harry slid out, and shockingly Harry’s dick gave a little jump at the noise.

Harry rearranged them on the bed so that Draco’s back was to Harry’s chest and Harry could fold his arms over Draco, stroking more of his soft skin.

“Mmm.” Draco had closed his eyes, and Harry could feel his body’s falling into sleep.

“No, no. No sleeping yet. We need to get cleaned up, come on.”

Draco huffed in protest but when Harry scooped him up into his arms, Draco perked up.

Draco had his arms wrapped around Harry’s neck and his hair tickled at Harry’s chin. Luckily all their rooms were fitted with a private bathroom so it wasn’t a long naked walk through the school to the communal showers. Harry kicked the door to the bathroom open and began running the water. Steam surrounded them as the tub filled up.

Harry set Draco down gentle on the edge of the tub and gently asked into his ear, “Can you stand?”

“Of course Potter, your cock isn’t that powerful.” Draco sounded insulted at Harry’s question and began to rise, before his legs shook so badly that Harry had to catch him to steady him. “Oh.”

Harry chuckled and helped them both into the running water. Harry latex back and guided Draco between his legs, wrapping his arms around him and kissing his neck gently as Draco began to relax into the heat. Draco stayed still and silent as Harry soaped up a cloth and ran it over Draco’s body. First he cleaned off the cried cum on Draco’s chest. Then his legs and limp cock. And up his shoulders and neck. Harry grabbed one of Draco’s many shampoo bottles and spent a good ten minutes running his fingers through those soft locks. Cleaning, and calming Draco.

“Harry,” Draco’s head had thumped back to rest on Harry’s chest, “You sure about this?” Draco breathed out. This was as brutally honest as he’d ever seen Draco. No jokes, no snark, just honest emotion.

“About you?” Harry asked, already knowing what Draco doubted.

Draco nodded, and turned his check against Harry’s chest so he could look up into his eyes. “I don’t want us to just be friends who fuck. I-“ he swallowed and broke eye contact, “I really fucking like you Potter.”

Harry beamed and rubbed his thumb against the back of Draco’s hand which he was holding beneath the water. “Good. I really fucking like you too Malfoy.”

Harry looked as a smile spread across Draco’s face, and he thought, possibly the first time since the war, that everything was going to be just fine.

**Author's Note:**

> J.K Rowling owns the original content of Harry Potter. This work is a fictional, fan-made creation.


End file.
